The Liberal And The Giant, A Parable (Since Liberals Seem To Love Parables)

I just serendipitously stumbled onto the perfect example of the liberal mindset. It's so precious it may make you weep, so get your Kleenex ready. I'm sure most of my readers have not seen this, but I'm sure you'll all appreciate the lesson in liberalism.

Once upon a time, in the eastern end of an east coast Commonwealth there lived a frustrated liberal blogger. This blogger was (and is) the target of many a barb from the village giant, a conservative blogger, (most of them well deserved I might add).

Recently our liberal friend made a software switch from Blogger to Wordpress. This can be a daunting task, even for experienced web persons, so she received quite a bit of help from the village giant. Now many denizens of the blog village did not consider this act to be out of character for the giant in the east, but our little liberal was quite surprised to be a recipient of such kindness. Especially since it came from the village giant.

The liberal blogger was so impressed, a decision was made to reward the village giant. "How can I best reward the giant?", the liberal blogger said to no one in particular. "I know, the giant really needs a new computer, but I can't afford the $400 or so that would cost. How can I show the giant just how big my heart truly is, and how compassionate I am, and how much I really want to thank him for his kindness"? The liberal blogger thought and thought, and came up with the only solution liberal bloggers have been trained to come up with.

"The solution is so simple," said the liberal blogger, "I'll just collect money from others here in the village, then I can use their money to buy my gift to give to the giant." And so the liberal blogger set about to do just that.

But soon the giant heard of the liberal blogger's efforts, and being the conservative he is, declined the offer graciously.

The moral of the story? Liberals are truly compassionate and thoughtful, and they always want to provide the most lavish gifts they can possibly provide, as long as they can take money from the other villagers to provide that gift. A conservative, on the other hand, would have simply bought the giant a cup of coffee and an omelet, and offered a genuine heartfelt thanks across the table at Denny's. That and a genuine offer to return the favor at any time.